April 6, 2010

Progress: What not to talk about at 7:00am

I've been sick since last Thursday and spent the entire weekend on the couch, hacking and sneezing.  We tried to go to Home Depot to get some ideas on the layout of the kitchen.  I made it there and then had a total nasal meltdown and had to go home.  Thus, I didn't get the dishes done (my turn) or do the laundry (my job) or finish the paper de-cluttering (I started last weekend).  I have a problem where my anal retentiveness is either all or nothing, I get overwhelmed and just add to the problem.  I know I should try to get more done during the week, but as soon as I get home it's crash time-- I've been volunteering as an advisor for my college sorority (Delta Gamma!) and get home LATE on those nights... ooooh, excuse central.  We had a discussion this morning (J's up early for 7am start time) and I was just waking up... icky... bad idea...

Here's what J instant messaged me when I got to work (I think/hope the article is supposed to be funny):

How to Get Your Wife to Help Clean the House
By Alicia Bodine, eHow Contributing Writer

It use to be that women stayed home with the children and cleaned the house. Men went to work all day to support their families. Nowadays it often takes two incomes to be able to survive financially. That means that both the husband and the wife have full time jobs. When they come home from work it is only fair that they split the housework as well. If you wife isn't helping you clean, there are a few things you can do to get her to start helping out.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Things You'll Need:


•Marriage counselor

Step 1  Ask your wife to help you. Let her know in a loving manner that doing all the housework is becoming a little too much for you. It may be that your wife isn't helping because she believes you enjoy doing it or that you can handle it. A little communication may be all you need to get your wife to help you clean.
Step 2   Make a cleaning chart and hang it on the fridge. Divide all the chores up between all of the family members and then your wife won't feel like you are singling her out. This may sound like something you would just use for your children, but it is an excellent motivator.
Step 3   Play some fun music and demonstrate to your wife how the upbeat music makes cleaning fun. Then start cleaning together. Work on one room at a time and take time to stop and dance here and there. This will make cleaning time something to look forward to.
Step 4  Call your wife's mother for some insight. Her mother may be able to tell you how she got her daughter to clean before she married you. You can then use that to get your wife to help you clean.
Step 5  Bring in a marriage counselor. The marriage counselor can do two things. He can find out why your wife isn't helping you clean, and be a mediator between the two of you. He can help you find a compromise.
Step 6   Let the house go. This means that you don't do any cleaning. By going on a cleaning strike your wife will start to notice exactly how much of the housework you have been doing. She will then begin to appreciate all of your hard work and begin helping out more.
Step 7  Romance your wife. Try spending some time winning over your wife's affection. She will then want to do some things to please you such as keeping the house looking nice. It may just be that your wife is going through the day-to-day motions and you need to awaken her to life again.

Tips & Warnings

If all of your attempts fail and you just can't continue doing all the cleaning yourself, hire a maid..Never resort to physical violence to scare your wife in to helping you. This is against law and you can land yourself prison time.


Haley said...

Did you respond by saying..."then make her your wife".

Anonymous said...

Ask her mother?
Make it a game. (Sock matching)
Set the timer.
Make some consequences. (No movie tonight, dear)
Reward chart!
Allowance jars!!!!
Encouragement (Oh, I like the way you cleaned the toilet!)

Mom said...

I read this to my friend Mary and we were laughing and crying it is so funny. Mom